Hmm...Things just haven't seemed right lately. All I want to do is sleep. And find a new roommate. No, maybe just a better apartment.
Here are my thoughts on this whole rommmate weirdness.

I complain that she's never home, and when I show up and find her there, I want to scream and throw her stupid skate shoes down the stairs and destroy everything she is so anal about.
"Why are you here? You left, remember? You just can't come back like this. Go back to your siamese twin. You're not wanted here." And I want to tighten her shoelaces right in front of her, making her feel helpless and vulnerable.
Spite.
I am full of spite.
She asked me if I was done with her. I told her no. But now I think I am. I don't even know her. Just one more person to come in and out of my life so quickly.

On a much happier note:
Bert's brother, Go-go(Greg) is in town. We hung out with him yesterday and he's over right now. He's really cool. He's the only one that looks like Bert. I can't wait for Thanksgiving tomorrow. Yummmyyy....First dinner at Bert's parents' house, then off to mine. :)
Things have been going really well between us lately. I just feel so good about everything. I'm acutally happy for once in a long time. I just need to work on these weird horomone issues.

It's getting dark outside and the wind has subsided. I feel alone and upset. I feel dumb. This is hard. I don't want to do it, so I just won't. I'll talk about something else, something to occupy my mind.

Snow White sits in front of the bright monitor. Nothing. She is unsure how to put in words how she feels. She can't do it. She's too afraid. She doesn't want to.
"I'll just keep it inside. Deal with it later. What is there to deal with anyway? Nothing. They're just emotions. You'll get over it." The pallid girl feels confused.

Ah, fuck it. It's all just a bunch of lame emotional shit that will soon pass anyway. A night on the town should cure it. Or a night of drinking, whichever comes first.

Burlesque show is cancelled. Big surprise there. It isn't the person's who was running it fault, but the "talent's". At least we know how much we can rely on certain people. What a weird two weeks. I don't have much to say lately. Things have been quite odd, so I've been focusing on that. Time to celebrate another month of not being pregnant. :) *giggles with glee*

I wish I knew where my Sashleyface was. I miss her. I miss a lot of people.
I keep having weird dreams. I miss Shelby. A lot.

God I hate pop culture.

For whatever reason, the 80's are back. And I'm right up there, following the trend. If I had the clothes, you might think I was Cyndi Lauper or some freak straight out of the Tubular era. I can't seem to get enough of Falco's "Rock Me Amadeus". I don't even want to talk about how much I love the video... Nothing's hotter than a german man in a white powdered wig with purple and pink sprayed into it.
Cat shares the same love for the 80's. In fact, we're going to express our undying devotion to the decade that gave us birth by...stripping to "Hey Mickey" in the upcoming Burlesque show.
Jealous? I know.
Time to go...do something other than sitting on my ass.
I know, I'll go rid the world of nasty 15 year old groupies. :-) Gotta keep Mother Earth clean, right? Oh the bitch that I am....

Snow White's pale cheeks are stained from the pink mascara running down her face. She feels alone, confused and out of place.

"It's just lately I've been feeling like I don't belong. Like the ground's not mine to walk upon."

How sad and pathetic it makes her feel that Conor Oberst knows what's going on. No one else does. Except for Sleeping Beauty. Only her Claire, her Rose White can understand the reason her heart breaks and the very same reason that puts it back together.
"It's a twisted place, this world of ours." she thinks to herself.
"Do we ever really figure out who we're really supposed to be?"
Snow White looks around the cold room. Empty. Her fingertips are little icicles, wiping away the tears, pushing back her hair. She thinks of her sister and wishes she were here. Her presence seems to make everything better. Where are her Seven Dwarves to console her?
She's sinking fast, drifting away. Her skin doesn't feel like her own. She doesn't feel like herself.
"Change. All I want to do is change. Fix myself, make me look more appealing." She has no fairy godmothers like Sleeping Beauty, no glass slippers or extravagant white carriage. Not even her favorite little dwarves can save her. Only her prince can draw away the poison slowly seeping from her lips into her body. She fears that she will stay in this poisoned sleep forever.

She recognizes these feelings. These feelings of jealousy, uncertainty, disappointment, confusion. They all hurt; leave a subtle lingering pain in her heart. But for some reason, it doesn't hurt as much. She understands. She's done it to him and he doesn't even know. Prince Beat isn't acting like the Prince that he usually is. He's acting like a Rockstar.
An inconsiderate rockstar who is selfish, ungrateful and sometimes rude. But after the show his is nice and playful and snuggly; kissing her neck as if she is the only princess he will ever love.
Jekyl and Hyde. Prince Beat and Bobby Beat the Rockstar. Snow White has yet to understand these radically different sides of him.

I have come across some issues that I need to fix.
1. My insecurities. Either I need to accept who I am or do something about the weight that bothers me.
2. Work on roommate issues.
3. Hang out more often with my friends.
4. Get a job.